"Life can change your direction, even when you didn't plan it All you can do it handle it, worst thing you can do is panic Use it to your advantage, avoid insanity manage To conquer, every obstacle, make impossible possible Even when winning's illogical, losing's still far from optional"
There are many things I don't understand. Many. Some I may understand with time and age. Some answers may appear one day. But there is one thing I will never understand.
Why do bad things happen to good people?
I simply do not know.
There is a woman. A kind hearted, compassionate, strong woman who is a friend of mine. And she is very ill right now. She is, as her best friend Tate refers to her, one of our "endo sisters". Which means, she, like many of the women in our "group" has this terrible disease called endometriosis. Unfortunately it's not a very well known disease. One that is quiet in society but loud in our bodies. The reasons we are sisters..well, there are so many reasons..but I guess to sum it up in the best way possible..there are no words for what we go through. There are no words to describe the debilitating pain that wakes us in the middle of the night. There are no words to describe the fear we feel over the idea that we won't be able to have children. There are no words for how many years we have tried to find relief-all of the hope we have put into it, and all of the despair we have felt when medicine failed us. Our bodies have failed us, doctors have failed us, medicine has failed us. But one thing that hasn't failed-our faith, devotion, encouragement, and hope for each other. This group of "endo sisters", many of which have endometriosis, and several others who have diseases much like it, is made up of the strongest women I have ever known. And our support for each other, even from a distance, is more real than many friendships we have known throughout our lifetime.
Brooke went in for her 6th surgery on October 1st, hoping to relieve some of the pain that she has been feeling for so long. What should have been a surgery that would bring hope and relief, turned into tragedy. The surgeons cut the artery in her leg, and Brooke nearly lost her life. She has been in the ICU for 6 days and has had a total of 14 blood transfusions. She had to go back in for surgery to remove 3 blood clots. Her blood is low in magnesium. She is exhausted. But, just a few hours out of that first tragic surgery, 9 blood transfusions in, all of us holding our breathe, waiting to hear how she is doing..Brooke reaches out. Even in her own tragedy, she sends us messages of hope-asking how we are doing, still encouraging us to fight the fight-when she is the one who is fighting the hardest battle of her life. One of the things she said still echoes inside my head and my heart..
"I want to live more than anything."
Brooke has one of the strongest, most endearing spirits I have known. The doctors told her that she is here for a reason, that God has a plan for her. And he does.
Here's the thing-Brooke is an angel. Plain and simple. God doesn't just have a plan. God took Brooke in his hands long ago, and made her His. Made her His angel. She, like many of the women I have met along this journey, is an angel. She came into our lives and made us stronger. She gave us hope. She showed us what strength and perseverance is. She gave us a gift that no one else could give.
And right now, she needs us. So, I call upon the angels. The ones in heaven, and the ones here on Earth-you, the members of the Chronically Ill Club, you angels on earth. Please pray for our fellow angel. She still has work to do here.